"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret", says Ambrose BierceHow i wish i could do that!
I had been a guy who seldom gets angry. But of late i get annoyed ever and anon. I hole up my emotions within me and don’t like to showcase it in public. I normally take a backseat when it comes to retaliating with words. So, it goes within me, within my heart, my mind all concealed up. But then too much stuffing gives me headache thinking about the incident.
I love to be alone when i am angry, so that i don’t speak with anyone and gradually get over it. Or i pray that i get angry during nights so that i can sleep over it. I said i hate to display emotions to the world but when it comes to my family i disembark my anger to them. And it’s just like i lost control of my tongue and am blabbering out absolute rubbish. The reason for not holding up my anger in front my parents (especially my mom) is maybe i think that they can understand me and my frustration. But then when I am alone and i think of it i feel like 'hell, what have i done? Why did i behave like that?' And then straightway go to my mom end up with lots of sorry and tears.
I know it’s not just me but everyone gets annoyed; turmoil of annoyance, sirocco of exasperation, whatever you call it, though most of us don’t admit it or display it. I know anger is a normal human emotion and to never feel annoyed is just like never be fully human. But i want to have more control over it. It should be like i must be governing anger and not the other way round. I don’t want to be a Mr. Hyde!
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” - Lord Buddha